Get to know Nic, Certified Internal Family Systems Therapist & Licensed Mental Health Counselor
is a white queer transmasculine mental health counselor based in Massachusetts with over twenty years of clinical experience. They are a Certified Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapist, IFS-I approved consultant and trainer, and national leader in using IFS with queer, trans, and nonbinary people.
Nic received their Master’s Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Lesley University in 2004. They have a deep understanding of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, and gender diverse people (LGBTQ+) drawn from both personal and professional experiences. Nic has served as the Head of Camper Wellness on the Leadership team of Harbor Camps, a summer camp for transgender and gender diverse youth. They also worked with refugees in a United Nations funded trauma program for eight years.
Nic’s approach to psychotherapy and consultation is based on the Internal Family Systems (IFS) model. They have been immersed in the IFS community since 2015, and have been active in raising awareness about gender identity in IFS training spaces. Informed by IFS, Nic believes that healing and growth comes from connecting clients to their inner wisdom. They are especially passionate about how the model can be used to empower queer, transgender, and nonbinary people.
In the therapy room, Nic has a quiet but persistent presence that allows their clients to feel safe and readily at ease. With compassion and clarity, they support people in processing the most traumatic and/or troubling of issues. Nic lives in Western Massachusetts, on the land of the Nipmuc and Pocumtuc, with their partner and two cats. They enjoy traveling, dance music and candlepin bowling.
Nic Wildes (they/them)
Nic is Co-Owner and Co-Director of SAYFTEE, a socially conscious group practice offering a range of services including family therapy, individual therapy, couple/relationship therapy, groups, workshops, training, consultation, and supervision. SAYFTEE is committed to serving gender expansive and LGBTQ+ people and those who love them.
Nic is Co-Founder of the Queer & Trans Internal Family Systems (QTIFS) project, which aims to make IFS accessible to queer and trans practitioners and the communities they serve through offering an affirming, intersectional, and anti-oppression framework for applying the IFS model. Nic regularly co-teaches an IFS Foundations Course for trans, nonbinary and queer clinicians.
Nic’s Work with IFS and Gender
In 2021, Nic was featured on The One Inside: An IFS Podcast. In the hour-long episode, Nic discusses topics of gender socialization, violence against transgender women, pronouns, and more within the context of the IFS model. Nic also discusses their work with Harbor Camps and SAYFTEE.
Nic wrote and recorded an IFS and gender meditation as a way to invite cisgender practitioners working with trans and nonbinary folks to develop their awareness and understanding of how they may relate to gender. The meditation has been used in a variety of IFS workshops.
In 2023, Nic authored a book chapter in Freeing Self: IFS Beyond the Therapy Room on IFS and gender. The chapter focuses on Nic’s own personal journey with IFS, gender, and community, and features recommendations for clinicians seeking to apply IFS with gender diverse clients.